Put a bird on it: Why Target’s $5 bird figurines are the best impulse buy I made this year

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Target is notoriously a dangerous place for impulse purchases.
If you want to buy something fun, cheap, and totally unnecessary, the bird figurines are perfect.
They come in lots of different styles (including seasonal additions) and are easily collectible.

It’s been a long-standing internet joke that Target is a dangerous place to shop. Before you know it, your quick trip to grab toilet paper leads to seven new candles, a pile of tasseled throw pillows, half-off Halloween candy, and everything you need to fully redecorate your recently redecorated bathroom.

-manda (@amanduhluna) October 22, 2017

Look, I’m not here to stop you. I too am someone who feels bewitched by the adrenaline rush of walking through a spacious suburban Target, unable to leave without at least a new bottle of nail polish I won’t use until eight months later because I barely paint my nails. (Plus, a snack.)

The only wisdom I can impart on you, the only crucial tip I have is this:

The Target bird figurines are the best impulse buy. You know the ones I’m talking about, they look like this:

Featherly Friends Harvest Bird with Glasses Decorative Figurine (small)Featherly Friends Harvest Bird with Rake Decorative Figurine (small)Bird with Scarf & Wreath Decorative Figurine Red (small)

First off, they’re the perfect price for something you admittedly do not need at all.

They’re $5 on the website. Even if you started buying every single new one that came out and collected, I don’t know, hundreds over your lifetime, you’d still be financially fine, I think?

They take up virtually no space in your home (and pssst, look great on shelves).

Do I regret spending money on cute shoes that never stopped being pinchy that I haven’t torturously worn enough to justify tossing, but that also take up closet space? Yes, with every new blister I get as a result, yes.

Do I regret getting a lightweight, 7×4 inch bird that has migrated from my windowsill to a corner shelf and looked charming in both spots? Would I be writing this if I did?

They’re the ideal blend of quirky and minimalist enough to fit into your adult home.

There’s a reason Target has been able to make “birds in people clothes I guess???” a lucrative business strategy, and it’s all to do with the execution.

I like my bird because he looks like he stepped out of a 1960s Michael Caine movie, about to take his tangerine-turtlenecked self to a local, rainy pub as he ponders his existence over a pint. I mean, look at him:

He has little shirtsleeves ON his wings! Cuff links and all! So classy.

The bottom line

The whole point of an impulse buy is that you don’t really weigh out the pros and cons. With Target birds, you don’t have to, because they’re cheap, will add no inconvenience to your life later, and get you lots of compliments. Really, you’d be bird-brained *not* to get one.

Featherly Friends Harvest Bird with Scarf Decorative Figurine (small)Bird with Santa Hat Overalls & Buffalo Plaid Decorative Figurine (small)Bird with Knit Hat & Scarf Decorative Figurine White (small)

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